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20 things to be proud of going into 2020!

Wow, we are heading into another decade, it sounds massive, so solid, so expectant.

So many things have happened in this past year, let alone the past 10,right?

At the end of the year I love to reflect, take stock and give thanks. To see where I can grow and be open to endless opportunities that await us.

I want to encourage you and want you to pat yourself on the back for all you have achieved in the past 10 years.

This past decade particularly has been quite iconic for me – I was 22 now turning 32 in a few days. I started my adult life in a big city, hundreds of kilometres away from my home. I have learnt that you can only prepare so much for life – you can study hard, be good, do good, go to church, forgive, mess up, learn, repeat the mess up, learn a harder lesson – eat loads, love loads, meet tons of people, battle the flu and other illnesses in between life, work, love and studies.

Don’t forget leaning about finances and dangerous creepy people. I have bought way too many sale items that when I think about it, I didn’t really like but thought it was amazing that I saved money, but in actual fact I really could have owned a luxury wardrobe by now if I put things into perspective.

I spent way too much on time on what others thought.

I did not speak up enough.

I did not ask questions.

I let people get away with disrespecting me.

I did not know how to handle emotion.

I was chaotic, but in a cute way. Almost too sweet that anyone could believe I had a temper. But that’s the thing – we all do.

I supressed true feeling and did know how to process.

I hid myself in clothes, shoes, eating and trying to be the perfect person.

I expected others to make me happy and pick up the pieces around me.

I blamed so many people for my unhappiness and the joy that was stolen through the turmoil of my 20’s.

But then, I realised.. the only person that can change all of this was me.

2016 was a turnasround for me – the transition of knowing that this was not all life in store for me.

So here are the 20 things that I am proud of and you should also consider making a list for yourself too, so you can remember the good things amongst all the hell.

  1. I always show up
  2. I am professional, polite and had an incredible work ethic
  3. I became a homeowner at 24
  4. I travelled
  5. I battled sickness and toxic relationships and pushed through
  6. I set boundaries
  7. I continue to pray
  8. I list the things I am grateful for everyday
  9. I helped people through their difficulties
  10. I am a good wife (most of the time)
  11. A reliable and trustworthy friend
  12. I am a devoted daughter / sister / granddaughter
  13. I am creative
  14. I am allowed to laugh and be funny and actually I am a funny person
  15. I am incredibly intelligent
  16. I am confidently humble and kind
  17. I see the good in people and situations
  18. I am dedicated to making my world a better place
  19. I am fit and healthy and have healed most of my illnesses through, eating more mindfully, letting go of negative energy and conserving my time
  20. I am an amazing, brave and involved mummy!

Now list your 20 things!

Remember good always happens amongst the bad – this is life. It’s how we reflect and the power we give the bad over the good that determines our freedom and growth.

Have a kick ass 2020

Pri.

xx

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DIY CHRISTMAS WREATH

Happy Holidays!

I love being crafty, the goof kind of course 😊

I made this DIY wreath for out front door with next to nothing.

You will need

  • A branch with leaves from your garden
  • Wire
  • Red Ribbon
  • Red Baubles (I kept these from last years Christmas Crackers)

How to Assemble the Wreath:

Twist the branch int a circle and fix together with the wire.

Finish off with ribbon and baubles and we are done!

This is an incredible DIY gift for friends and family too .

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Something about Parenting – our kids world

She will inherit my faith or my fear – We choose

We as parents are really our kids compasses, their encyclopedias of life

Doesn’t this jut blow yourd mind? When a child is born, they honestly are a blank canvas – a beautiful bubbly innocent soul, waiting to absorb and learn and grow. Every idea, opinion, feeling / response they will develop as a belief that they will firmly believe.

How profound is this – “You are not what you think you are —–pause— but—what you think , YOU ARE!

So as parents, if we raise our kids to believe they are good, they are conquerors, they are loved, supported, they are allowed to make mistakes, they can be anything they set their minds too – THEY WOULD BELIEVE that they are all these things and more.

Fact: by the age of 3, their sense of self locks in and become a fundamental part of their make up. This sense of who they are becomes their reality.

So love on your kids. Break the mould of what can and can’t be done. We are their everything- lets make them everything they can be!

More than anything lets make them feel safe, love and accepted. This will give them a sense of security for the rest of their lives.

The truth about my twenties

 

I have 4 days left of being twenty something. Yep.. the big 3 – 0  is around the corner and to be honest I am excited about it.

When I think about the past decade and what life has handed me it has been a tough hard ride with a lot of good times too.

We expect our twenties to be carefree, the most fun time of our lives the time for partying, exploring, dating and just living life with no regrets right. It’s where you start your first job, meet different people and even the person you may want to marry. You set out to see the world define your style and ultimately start living as a fully-fledged, funky, cool adult.

Well that’s what I thought it should be!

My journey has obviously been slightly different to this expectation and to be honest it freaked me out most of the time. It’s been a mix of good and bad, hurts and celebrations – I have learnt tremendous lessons, been depressed at times and survived a series of traumatic experiences, travelled to some beautiful places, grown in my career and have had to make some really hard decisions in my personal and professional life along the way. It hasn’t been an easy ride, yet, I am can see the lemons that have turned into lemonade over the years and all the valuable lessons and goodness it has given me.

These are the biggest lessons that have shaped me that I would love you share with you! *Click on the arrows to expand*

Early twenties

For the first 4 years of my twenties I was trying to define who I was – I graduated from law school at 21, my parents divorced in the same year. I moved away from home at 22 and started my internship at one of the most prestigious law firms in the country.

Lesson 1 –  You can achieve anything with sheer determination 

I was driven to make a success of my life and blocked out the sadness of leaving home.

My legal career wasn’t what I expected it to be (yes it was challenging and I worked long hours and  attended lectures and night and studied for board exams in between – this was the side that I was used to – just put my head down and worked – that’s how I got through my degree – always focused on the end goal and blocked everything else out).

The side that I wasn’t prepared for was the emotional strain and mental exhaustion. The strain it placed on my body and the extreme exertion I felt literally stretched in every area. The side that I left unattended and blocked out – the vulnerable side that I didn’t pay attention to much reared its head the most in outbursts of frustration and fits of rage.  The side when no one tells you that a cute pencil skirt and heals that was promoted so well in Legally Blonde and by Rachael Zain in Suits doesn’t get you the respect you deserve in the workplace. All the aspirations of this high-profile corporate career life was not what I enjoyed in the least.

You get stepped on and stretched in ways that you would not expect.  The corporate world is one vicious cycle of working to prove your worth everyday, building a thick skin and also becoming fearless in the pursuit of success requires you to shut down to the elements of goodness to life. They say the best things in life are free right?! Then surely those things should’ve be attainable but I felt that they were the hardest to  ( self-worth, time, laughter, vitality and joy). These things slipped further and further away from me.  Having IBS and stomach and bladder issues all of a sudden and being in a constant state of stress was the reality check for me and of what my life was turning into – I decided to leave the legal practice profession.

Lesson 2: Often what you set your sights on and often work hard to achieve is not what’s meant for you.

Mid twenties

I was unemployed for 4 months and lived off my savings until I found a job in another large corporate organisation (thank goodness I was savvy enough to save) – I was 24. The amazing thing that my personal life was looking up – I got married to my stud of a husband in November that year. And I honestly thought we were going to runoff into the sunset and life was going to be just beautiful. Well it wasn’t all that easy!  The first few years of marriage were very challenging. We were both very young and tried our best at making things work despite the challenges we faced. We fell hard in certain respects but most of all we learnt to love harder to get us to where we are today -going through life together and building a future we want for our lives and relationship.

Lesson 3 – Marriage is hard work and requires both people to be committed to build it. You need to share the same goal, it takes lots effort, but is so so worth it!

At 25 , still with the corporate job I furthered my studies to become more specialised in the area I ended up in, Tax Law (the Lord has a sense of humour). So I sacrificed weekends for two years and obtained another degree.

Lesson 4 – Be open to expanding and furthering your potential even though sometimes you may not understand it

In this same year I was hijacked and robbed at gunpoint and left severely traumatized.  This left me a bit numb and I questioned a lot about humanity and life itself. I started shutting down and cocooning.

Lesson 5 – most hardships happen to you without your consent and is a painful process and mostly unfair. (this one is still hard for me)

At 26 I lost a precious soul that I loved so much –  This was the catalyst for a downward spiral for me. I was depressed! I didn’t laugh, I didn’t eat much, I lost all enjoyment for life.

Lesson 6: Depression is a silent destroyer of your dreams.

After months and months of deep sadness and lack of passion for life, I realised that I couldn’t live in such darkness and decided to start searching for some light. God has always been so gracious in his blessings and I started to count my blessings instead of my hardships and really prayed for wisdom in this time. This was the beginning of my journey of self-discovery and turning my life around.

Lesson 7: The only way to step into the light is to want it and grab it!

Late twenties

At 28 – I was recruited into a management position at another large organisation. I knew from the beginning that this wasn’t the field/role for me but I stuck with it because I saw the opportunity that it would bring.

Lesson 8 – Keep going and be open to opportunities that come your way.

Even though it  is not my dream job – I am learning as much as I can to build myself up for better things to come.

At 29 I celebrated 10 years of being together with my husband and 5 years of marriage. We went to London to see John Mayer in concert! We have been on a few awesome adventures and I think the most amazing one is that we are having a baby!

Lesson 9: Life gets better –  There is sunshine after the heavy storms.

A few days left of being twenty something

Whatever the next decade holds for me this I know – it will bring with it challenges but also joy. Down days but also happy ones. New friends and new experiences. Most of all I am going to embrace each day and live more intentionally. To spread love and light and be kind to myself to those around me. I will make mistakes, but I will learn from them. I will fail at times but I will persevere to be more. Both ups and downs are essential for my growth and defines who I ultimately become.

Lesson 10 – Be proud of where you and how far you have come at each season of your life – if you are not happy with where you are or who you have become, YOU have the power to change it by believing that there is more. There always is, trust me, I know!

Stay awesome and true to you!

Much love – Pri xxx

I am a dreamer, please tell me I’m not the only one!

Everyday is a step closer to fulfilling your dreams.

That sounds a bit airy fairy, right?!

When we talk about pursuing happiness. Making our dreams come true or following a path to find our passion, others may scoff at us thinking we are living in a false sense of reality or yes a “dreamland”. Dreaming is often considered childlike and too whimsical for us adults to do because life is hard as it what is  …we just have to get on with what we need to make this life work.

The sad reality is that living with no hope or passion leads to a sad and depressed life. Yes we do have to just get on each day but it does not always have to be a drag.

We do have to make a living and make ends meet. We do have to wake up each day and get into the routine of chores, work, home, deadlines, difficult relationships, hardships, health challenges, loss, grief, anxiety –  Life can be one hard, disappointing, monotonous and dull event after the other.

The powerful truth is that we have the ability to change our approach to life’s hardships and monotony.  The way to do this is by realising that we have the power to change our mindset and most of all our heartset to life and what it gives us.

I have figured out that one of the most effective ways to do this is to start the day by claiming and noticing all the good things in your life (even though you may not be able to see it immediately) start with small things – Make a list of these things.

By being mindful of all the good things in your life and the wonderful things around you – you start appreciating life instead of just existing in it.  You will see that by having a sense of gratitude and living with eyes open to blessings that have come your way will bring with it elements of joy and calm in your day that relaxes you and will spike your happiness.

Being a dreamer should come naturally to us, we were designed this way… to have a child-like sense of curiosity and wonder. To look at each day as an opportunity, but life has a sneaky way of dwindling this ability.

All I can say is that if you don’t have a dream in your heart life is always harder. Start small and finally you will dream big! Your dreams are your little seeds of magic that you can sow into your life that will start to transform the amount of fun and satisfaction you have. We all have the power to change the course of our life – one dreams and belief at a time! Make it, shape it and believe in it.

Oprah said that “The biggest adventure you can have is to live the life of your dreams”. I sure do want to have some great adventures, how about you?

Much love,

Pri. Xxx